IMPORTANT SCIENCE NEWS
Recent neuropathological studies into the misuse of apostrophes have overturned the old classroom adage: ‘if in doubt – leave them out’.
A new study by Venkman and Spengler has proven that all those orphaned apostrophes collect in an area of the brain known as ‘The Area of Jones’.
When Jones Area (shit) reaches capacity; it invariably ruptures, releasing thousands of furious apostrophes into the brain, where they pair up to become inverted commas, leaving the victim unsure of what’s “real” and what “isn’t”.
If in doubt…
they’ll eat your brain.
.Next: What happens if you forget to use your colon.