Buttons (part 2)

Further research into all those buttons you don’t press, just in case they’re evil and nobody told you:

I pressed the F11 button and my eyelids flipped inside out. I’m fairly sure the two things were unrelated, but I won’t be trying it again. Don’t let me stop you though.

My keyboard has a separate number pad with arrows on it. These arrows do not enable you to drive your desk around the office. No amount of race car noises, no matter how realistic, will convince your colleagues otherwise.

The buttons marked PgUp and PgDn are useful if your pigs are too high or too low. Because nobody likes a misaligned pig.

If you hit the escape button repeatedly with your head, while shouting “The Scottish are coming! The Scottish are coming!” and frothing slightly at the mouth, you will be removed to a secure unit from which escape is extremely difficult. Which is ironic.
Buttons – Part 1

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About Alex

I am an Excel spreadsheet that gained sentience back in 2000.

17 responses to “Buttons (part 2)”

  1. phoenix143 says :

    This is just too funny. As a chronic computer phobic I found it so good I may have to steal.

  2. Rock Salt says :

    The Curious Case of the Misaligned Pig. I see a novel in the making.

  3. clownonfire says :

    I’ve learned not to push my wife’s buttons.
    Life has been better since then.

  4. Bethylicious says :

    The last one had me chuckling long enough to make my husband look at me like I had 5 heads…

  5. myronathon says :

    … ironic cause the Scottish are coming?! lol

  6. hazeldove76 says :

    “The buttons marked PgUp and PgDn are useful if your pigs are too high or too low. Because nobody likes a misaligned pig.”

    Lmao!!!!!

  7. thefuture2020 says :

    Dude you be having some davinchi code slang going on here, I’m still trying to figure out what in the hell is going on here with this lingo -,o

  8. Cheryl says :

    close your eyes hold down the Esc key, click your heels 3 times while using the following mantra ‘there’s no place like home’ ‘there’s no place like home’ ‘there’s no place like home’. Very Zen like way to start yoru work day.

  9. Randall Head says :

    I got shafted, my keyboard has Page Up/Down keys; how much extra do I have to pay for superior pig alignment capabilities?

  10. living4bliss says :

    I’m new here, but this is funny. Thanks for the laugh.

  11. Jennifer Sommer says :

    If only the arrows did let you drive your desk around the office, I’d have so much fun.

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