Dear Lady on the Treadmill to the Left of Mine
Are you imagining yourself gambolling through a field of saucer-eyed bunnies while flying an improbably large kite emblazoned with an advertisement for corned beef? You certainly look like you are. Maybe it’s just indigestion.
Are you wondering whether you have the business acumen to run a successful gym that caters exclusively for people called Jim? I know I am. It’s a niche market. I would race you to the patent office, but I see that your treadmill is going faster than mine and your trainers seem to be more effective than my flippers. Also, this snorkel is making it hard to breathe and the towel is coming undone from around my waist, so I’m going to need to stop soon and have a cup of tea. I find it tricky, pouring tea into the top of a snorkel, don’t you? If you’re nearly finished, could you come and help me? It’ll save me having to take off the boxing gloves and you can show me photos of your enormous kite.